Wednesday, December 31, 2008

HEY!!


I know I know, What the heck is "Hoppy New One" all about?


Allow me to explain, as most of you already know from a previous post my Hubby is a bus driver here in So. Cal. Believe me he has plenty of stories from the road, unfortunately today this is not one of them...
I know, what a tease right!?


See here in So Cal we have a large "English as a Second Language" population, and Hubby gets plenty of natives to that population on his bus, last year on New Years Eve Hubby had lots of people trying to tell him "Happy New Year" but they didn't realize they were saying it wrong... they would say
"Hey! Hoppy New One"


So in honor of our ESL students
I would like to tell all of you guys
"my fellow BBF's (Blogger Best Friends) and Rockstars"


"Hey! Hoppy New One!"
I hope you have safe & fun night tonight

Monday, December 29, 2008

Random Rant

So I’m sitting here at my desk,
minding my own business trying to look productive
when I hear a horrendous sound coming from the hallway near my door.

It's a child.
Not your typical loud crying child,
but rather a possessed, blood curdling, screaming child!

I open the door and glance in the parent’s direction as to look like I’m asking
“If everything is alright”
when really I’m looking in their direction to say
“Really asshole!? You can’t hear that?”
And they are just sitting there ignoring the spawn of Satan like he’s not even making a sound.

WTF? …I hate people like that.

Not everyone can tune out your kid the way you can people.
Not everyone thinks it’s funny or cute.
Not everyone will tolerate it without wanting to choke or punch your child!

Normally I will call you out in public because I’m a jerk like that
and I will tell you to tend to your child or even use my mom’s favorite
“watch your kid before someone walks off with them!”

But I couldn’t do that at work. *insert sad face here* Instead I just had to politely smile, nod, return to my desk and wish chicken pox on the entire family.

Kidding! … Just on the parents.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Sunday, Drunk Day!


Today I had to go to work for what I thought was going to be a few hours, I had this project I needed to finish. I was supposed to go in the day after Christmas but I was too busy sleeping, watching TV and eating so I lost track of time. Who wants to go to work the day after Christmas? Honestly!

When I left for work this afternoon Hubby was sitting where he usually sits on Sunday afternoons... in front of his laptop checking his fantasy football stuff, and multi-tasking playing a game on his PSP, while watching one game on our 42 inch plasma TV in our bedroom and watching another game on his 27 inch LCD "video game TV" which is also in our bedroom so he can play his PS3 or watch two games at once.

Yes, two TV's in our bedroom with a laptop and a PSP
forever attached to his hand! Anyway, I leave around 2:30pm,
I get to work and just start getting shit done!

Side Note: I don't know if I've mentioned that Special Girl Chris also works with me? Well she does and she just so happened to be working tonight.

So as I was saying, I'm getting my work done, I'm on a roll! Then Special Girl Chris shows up and distracts me for a few minutes, she's talking away. I'm trying to listen to her yet finish my work at the same time when I go to hit the "details" button and check my work, when really I hit the "delete" button and now everything is gone.

I wanted to cry, scream and punch her all at the same time.
Needless to say this set me back quite a bit.

I take a break and call Hubby, I let him know what happened and it's going to take longer than I planned. He sounds a bit distracted but I figured he was watching TV or on the computer...

Hubby: I'm hungry, what's for Dinner?

Bon Don: Tell one of the girls to make something for dinner,
since I'm stuck for a bit longer.

Hubby: Ok, but I'm hungry

Bon Don: Do you want me to pick something up on the way home then?

Hubby: Oooo yeah, but what?

Bon Don: Well what do you want? Jack's?

Hubby: Nah, it's ok... I'll get something here.

Bon Don: Ok sounds good.

Hubby: I'm hungry...

Bon Don: Are you drinking??

Hubby: *laughs* Can you tell? I'm feeling pretty good!
WHAT!?? It's my Saturday and I felt like having some beer!

Bon Don: *laughing* OK... well have fun! I'll see you in a bit.

Hubby: K! ... I'm hungry

Bon Don: BYE Babe.

I finally finish up, and head on home. I pull up to my house when I see Hubby standing outside on the porch, listening to blaring music on his cell phone smoking a cigarette. Hubby doesn't smoke, but when Hubby is drunk... Hubby smokes.

I walk up and I'm greeted by a big smile,
a swerving stance and blood shot eyes...

Yup he's drunk.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

End Scene

Finally it's over... all the eating, buying, spending.... and eating!

Who am I kidding, it was my idea to do all the eating!

This year we ditched both our family's. Usually we try and squeeze in my family on Christmas Eve and then we make our rounds on Christmas day to his family but not this year. We both worked on Christmas Eve so we used that as an excuse to stay home and not drive. We took the girls out to dinner, picked up some sweets on the way home and then we forced the girls to watch TV with us for the rest of the night.

Christmas day we opened gifts and munched on yummy food all day long.
This year we tricked our girls, we bought them all these random gifts from the .99 cents store and made them believe those were there gifts! HA!
I know, we're mean parents.

Finally when all hope was lost, we brought out one more bag with these little plastic wallets that had good old fashion CASH in it... they were very happy! Later Mz. Tapz came over with her tribe which is half of my God-Children, we watched movies and ate... again.

Last night when my BFF Himbo came back from The Tundra we all went shopping because the girls wanted to spend money, after shopping we came back here and had a nice bottle of wine, cheese & crackers and other yummy snacks. Apparently I was a boring date because Himbo fell asleep the entire time he was here, we had to start the movie over twice! Himbo went home and then Special Girl Chris came over at 11pm and we snuck out to see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, when we left the theater it was 240AM! Who goes to the movies that late!?
Honestly Chris!

Anyway, that was my fabulous Christmas story,
I'm so ready for New Years. Bring on the Champagne!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

And The Award Goes Too...


Yay I got an award!

One of my "BBF's" (Blogger Best Friends) Kellie from
Beauty is in the Eye of the Beer Holder thinks I'm awesome.

I love awards, it's like being picked to take the attendance sheet to the office in elementary school or getting more presents than all of your friends and family on Christmas!

Kellie is a cool kid in my book. Not only does she have a great blog, she has the cutest doggy AND can party like a Rockstar! Yay Kellie!

Here are the rules:
1. Write a post about the award
2. Link back to the person who gave you the award
3. Nominate at least 7 other blogs for the award
4. Add links to those blogs on your blog
5. Leave a message for the nominees on their blogs
6. Name 10 honest random things about yourself

1. I baby talk my doggies all the time...and my Hubby.
2. Stupid people make me sick.
3. I wish I liked seafood, but I can only
eat fish & chips and shrimp...sometimes
4. I'm a freak because my hair grows super fast! (12 inches a year)
5. I drive with my right shoe off.
6. I giggle like Betty Rubble from the Flintstones and laugh a lot.
7. I was kicked out of 7 schools (oopsie)
8. I love to smell like Coconut or Pina Colada in the summer
and Vanilla in the winter.
9. If you don't shower everyday, I will notice.
10. I'm a closet Celine Dion Fan
I would like to wish you all a Merry Christmas
& Happy Holidays my friends!

Love, *Bon Don*

Monday, December 22, 2008

*Sigh*

It's super slow around blog world during the holidays!
I'm kind of bored.
I've been able to have my own laptop all to myself all day
but unfortunately most of my daily reads are not very active today...
Boo.
Why must people go on vacation and spend time with their families
when I am able to devote all my time and attention to them?
The good thing is I've been able to venture out all over blogworld
and check out some new potential daily's,
there were quite a few who caught my eye.
Just to be clear, I'm not threatening anyone...
I'm not looking to replace you or anything like that,
I mean, just because you had better things to do instead of
making me laugh with your funny, quick-witted posts!
I simply just thought I'd like to add to the wonderful list of cool kids.
But I wouldn't test me again if I were you.
Kidding!
Maybe.
Well ok then... I'll be here.
Waiting.

Having Some Issues...


Hi everyone, just letting you know that I'm working on
my update for you guys but "somebody"
feels like they can just fall asleep where ever they want!!

Friday, December 19, 2008

"Tonight We're Gonna Get F'kd Up!"

*By the way, the title refers to one of my favorite comedians Katt Williams,
if you haven't seen "Pimp Chronicles" I "highly" recommend it! *

Yes we really just might!

Tonight we are having our work "Holiday Party"
Well as some of you already know
I already hang out with most of my friends
from work on a regular basis, therefore we are quite comfortable
with each other already, we are not just co-workers
but we are actual friends...
and if you ask me, that my friends spells trouble!

You see during lunch we are already the loudest group,
seriously it's borderline obnoxious.
Not a day goes by without one of us saying something really Dirt-Bag"ish"
(yes I made that up)
We always end up crying from laughing so hard EVERYDAY!

And now they want to put us all together...
outside of work, in a social environment, WITH booze
and expect exactly what?

See last year I opted to NOT attend, I know BOO! right?

Let me tell you though, this year I will not be a Debbie Downer because
after the falling over couches, breaking wine glasses,
lap dances from Dula Dip,
drunken husbands hitting on other co-workers in front of their wife...

I'm not going to miss it for the world!
Don't you just love the holidays?
Wish us luck!
***UPDATE***
OK so I posted Part 2, but I pulled it.
If you want to know the story,
just let me know and I'll forward it to you.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Christmas Bandwagon

Christmas: The time when everyone gets Santamental.
Don't get me wrong I'm not one of those people who wears red all month and decorates my house to the nines. Believe it or not, I actually didn't even like this holiday for years! (traumatizing childhood story not important) But lately I've began to appreciate everything I have to be grateful for and I'm proud to say I've finally jumped on the Christmas Bandwagon!
I've Been listening to Christmas Carols since November, (ok I admit I even snuck in a few during the summer) I can't help it I just love cold weather and nothing reminds me more of that then
"Baby It's Cold Outside" ...I love that song!

Tell me your favorite Christmas Song...

Pretty Please

(I asked nicely so no excuse!)

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

A Wet Hump Day

Dirty birdy's it's not that kind of "wet hump day" I mean It's cold and raining here, but I'm kind of happy and excited about it. The sound of the rain is so tranquil and the cool air is always a treat. All I've been wanting to do is fill up on warm drinks, baked goodies and hot soups (and I have)
This morning I was all snuggled up with the ultimate heat sources (Hubby & Blue) when I realized... I think I'm late!
Yup I'm late.
See the kids had a late start today which means they don't have to be at school till after 9am, which also means nobody woke me up on time since they were able to sleep in.
Yes, my children wake me up in the mornings. Don't hate.
Well instead of jumping out of bed and rushing, I took my sweet ass time!
I enjoyed a long hot shower... I sat on the sofa watching the rain through the window for about 15 minutes instead of putting on my make-up . I drove to work with hardly any traffic in the street blasting the most fabulous CD that Hubby made me, I even stopped for a breakfast croissant and chocolate milk.
Jealous?

Monday, December 15, 2008

My Kind of Running Around

Yesterday my favorite sister in the whole wide world flew in from Cabo to visit for the next couple of days, you all know her as Runaway Train.


I had to pick her up from LAX...


I hate LAX.


It's SOoo not like Orange County Airport.

See at least here in Orange County they offer you valet service, and if you are picking someone up and want to wait in arrivals they practically offer you a Starbucks Mocha to make sure you're comfortable!

Not LAX I got yelled at by the angry cops on bikes! Ugly pedestrians that had the nerve to just walk into traffic and hold up a hand commanding you to stop for their impatient asses.

Not luxurious at all!

Anyway, I haven't seen her in a minute so I was willing to put up with L.A. for the day, but I can't help but have this sneaky feeling she didn't just fly in to "see me"... why you ask?

I'll tell you why, exactly 17 days prior she commented on the blog that she was craving a cupcake that looked exactly like my cupcake picture on my page. Well she searched all over Cabo for one but according to her the entire town does not believe in frosting.

"All of a sudden" the broad shows up "to visit" umm humm... sounds suspicious to me!

She tried to butter me up by taking me out to dinner (which by the way ALWAYS works) than BAM!

she said, "We need to find me a cupcake, but it has to be the right kind of frosting" of course Sprinkles was closed already and Albertsons was just not going to cut it with "whipped frosting" so we ended up going to Downtown Disney for some yummy cupcakes.


She didn't make it out the store before tearing into one.



...It was the right kind of frosting!

On our way home Himbo called and said he wanted to hang out with us for a night of cupcakes, hot tea and rented videos. (I know, we party like Rockstars right?)
So before we went home we picked up Himbo and swung by Del Taco because he was hungry and I've learned the hard way to get him proper nourishment or else we either have a hypoglycemic coma on our hands or a very pissed off Betch!
Last night he was pissed! The girl screwed up his order, but it's ok... we handled it like calm responsible adults! Sheez you can't take us anywhere *smile*

Saturday, December 13, 2008

That's Why She's Dingy!

So yesterday while I was at work I got a call from my daughter Jo,
it went a little something like this...

*ring ring*

BD: Good Afternoon, this is Bon Don...

Jo: Hi mom just wanted to tell you that I had to take Dingy a bath. (Dingy is our other Chihuahua)

BD: Ok, make sure you blow dry her really good, because it's kind of cold outside

Jo: I will... Oh and I'm cleaning the floor in the living room.

BD: ... Ookayy??

Jo: You want to know why I took Dingy a bath and why I'm cleaning the floor?

BD: What happen?

Jo: Dingy spilled over a can of paint in the back yard, sniffed it, stepped in it and ran into the house with white paws...ran around the living room and jumped on the sofa.

BD: Are you serious!??

Jo: Yup! she had white paint on her nose that was hard to get off, now I'm working on the floor...

Booo Dingy!












*UPDATE*

The paint came off of everything including little miss Picasso "Dingy"

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Himbo McFarland

As most of you already know my BFF and Fellow Blogger "Himbo" is always blasted all over my blog, that's because we work and play together all the time and I guess it helps that we live only a couple of blocks away from each other too!


He wrote a little story of how we became the dynamic duo click HERE check it out!
Love,
Bon Don Walker

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Bon Don

Some of you might have wondered...
What the heck is a Bon Don?
Well "Bon Don" is my nickname.
My real name is Yvonne (pronounced "E-von")
I have lots of nicknames for some reason, here's a few of many...
"Bon Don"
"Bonnie"
"Bon Bon"
"Bonnaville"
"Yvoncey"
"V'oncey"

Secretly my favorite is Bon Don, mostly due to this cute cool kid...

This is my little "big" brother,
he 's younger but waaaay taller! (6' 4? not sure)

My brother & I are nine years apart,
so I took over as "Little Mother Hen" while my Momma was at work.
This meant I had lot's of quality time with my lil bro.
You see my brother was very hyper as a child, he was around 2 years old when he liked climbing from his high chair, then on top of the fridge just to jump off. I remember I would have to lean my mom's mattress over the foot of her bed frame (like a slide) and let him roll down over & over into a stack of pillows against the wall until he tired himself out.
When he finally settled down I would try to teach him words.
I started off with my name... I would say, "E-Von"
He would say, "Bon-Don"
I would say, "Eeee - Vonnn"
He would say, "Bonnn-Donnn"

This would go on for a while,
so from then on instead of trying to correct him,
my name just changed to Bon Don.
I liked it, because it was mine and so cute *smile*

Thanks for my super cool nickname Nocha!
(don't ask why I call him that) (yes ladies he's single)

Monday, December 8, 2008

Oopsie (forgot to post this yesterday)

Man!! Bon Don has been super duper busy at work lately!
It's been taking up way too much of my time.
Booo.
I ended up getting stuck working really late Friday night, we were super busy at work. I was about to past out when an angel appeared in the form of another manager I work with and she brought me this...

a yummy Sonoma Goat Cheese Salad
(organic arugula, radicchio, Belgian endive,caramelized walnuts, dandelion honey vinaigrette)

...and cheese cake. It made my night go a whole lot faster!

I love when people know they can win this fat girl over with food!

Friday, December 5, 2008

Guess What!
I don't have to wake up early tomorrow cause it's Saturday! woo hoo
Happy Friday!
Anyone got any big plans for the weekend?
We might be hosting the fight tomorrow night, and I'm going to try and sneak in a movie or two Sunday. I want to try this new theater that has a 21 & over side, complete with leather recliners and a bar!

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Game Night

So my friend Dula Dip invited me & Hubby to a Football Game
and a few other friends to see the Chargers play the Colts in San Diego.
Here are some pictures from our day/night out!
This is the hottie football player I drove with to the game...
Just kidding it's my Hubby! (Fooled you huh!)
He's trying to ignore me while I sing EVERY song on the radio.

We stopped here before the game to load up on
nutritious drinks before the game...

What!?... There were PLENTY of lemons in my Coronas,
Therefore I fulfilled my daily fruit intake!



After watching a few games at Trophy's,
we stumbled over to the train station
to take us into Qualcomm Stadium


We met the nicest people in the parking lot,
they helped us prepare for the game by offering
delicious refreshments from a very sophisticated drinking vessel!

This was our awesome view of the field,
I could almost smell the uniform pants blend
of polyester-spandex from my seat I tell ya!


This is a picture Hubby took...
I'm sure these guys were trying to get a good shot of
the "field goal posts" just like my Hubby
but those pesky cheerleaders keep getting in the way!

Had to throw in this one of Dula Dip & Bon Don at the end of the night...

We were tired... not drunk! *wink wink* So don't let the red eyes and wiped off make-up fool ya. *giggle*

End Scene.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Missed You Guys!


Wow feels good to be back!

I didn’t plan on taking a mini hiatus this holiday weekend, but I guess I kind of did! I've been out & about lately so I have some pictures for you coming up.

Being gone for more than 3 days in blog world feels like you’ve been gone for weeks!

I just wanted to check in real quick and say Hi and I missed you...Okay, I must go and catch up on all my fabulous reads and laugh my little heart out with you crazy kids!

Lucky Me

Check out my button!

My girl Far from Everyday Soap Opera
made it for me cause I'm so awesome!
Okay she made it for me because I entered her contest,
but I perfer to think it was made for me because she thinks I'm awesome.

Thanks Far I luv it!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Decaf Kind of Girl!

The other day my girls wanted to ditch me for a school football game, so I dropped them off at the game picked up my Momma and headed over to Himbos house. Yes my Mom.

My Mom loves to hang out at Himbos for the following reasons:


1. Because he got her hooked on watching Six Feet Under

2. We always pick up a pie from Marie Calendar's on the way over, and she's not allowed to eat junk food or too much sugar but I make an exception when we are at Himbos so needless to say a pie makes her little heart sing!

3. Most importantly because she's not allowed to have coffee hardly ever, so it's a treat for her to have it in the first place...Well Himbo makes a pot of his gourmet coffee AND loads it up with flavored creamer for her!

4. Oh yeah...and according to the both of them "How can you not want to hangout with The Luxurious Prince Himbo?"

So we hung out, had a blast... killed the entire pie and they both drank about two pots of coffee! I say "they" because I am a decaf only kind of girl. I can't have coffee because I will not shut the fuck up! I will talk and talk and TALK, my little heart races, I start feeling light headed, I develop a headache then I crash...HARD! Yup that's my relationship with those magic little beans... Well that night the coffee smelled sooo yummy and I seemed to have drank all the fruit punch Himbo keeps on hand for me so I poured myself a cup.

Aww man it was DELICIOUS! I drank the entire cup.

I got back home around 1:30am-ish and started talking to my Hubby about my entire day... and talking... and talking. He had this look on his face like, "Really? ... you have this much to talk about right now?"

Then I realized I sounded just like this:

So I simply said "Oh, I had coffee at Himbos..."

Hubby then nodded and smiled, now understanding why his wife was acting like a spun-out crack head.

I had to forced myself to fall asleep by counting the endless number of heart palpitation's per minute!

Thanks Himbo.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Loves It...Loves It Not

Bon Don Loves It:
When my spoiled brat keeps
her beanie baby away from me
(look at that stare!)
Bon Don Loves It, Not:
Touching me with dirty hands
or eating with dirty hands.
Who does that? Honestly!
Bon Don Loves It:
My Pretty Pradas,
they don't hurt my nose like wire frames
and I look super nerdy cool!

Bon Don Loves It, Not:
Sitting in a chair that someones ass heat
just kicked the temperature up to blazing hot.
Can two cheeks really produce THAT much heat?

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Feeling The Love

Yay Another Award!
Lip Smacker over at Lipstick Diaries
gave me The Uber (synonym to Super) Amazing Blog Award
(Thanks Lipsmacker! You know I got your back!)
This blog award given to sites that:
~ inspire you ~
makes you smile and laugh
~ gives amazing information ~
~is a great read~
~ has an amazing design ~
and/or any other reasons you can think of that makes them uber amazing!


The rules of this award are: Put the logo on your blog or post.
Nominate at least 5 blogs that for you are Uber Amazing!
Let them know that they have received this Uber Amazing award by commenting on their blog. Share the love and link to this post and to the person you received your award from.

I'd like to pass this award to the following 5 Uber Amazing Bloggers!

(Is Uber Amazing! Always Funny & Witty)

(Always makes me smile and laugh out loud in front of my boss!)

3. Tova Darling over at The Secret Life of Tova Darling
(She gives amazing insight and information)

4. Lbluca over at LBLUCA77
(Is always a great read)

5. Gabby over at Gabby She Wrote
(My girl from the OC has a very cute blog design!)

Little Chat With Myself

Hey Bon Don, you called into work yesterday... you must be really busy catching up on all the work that was left from Monday.
Umm no not really, all I did today was have Dula Dip take a knife looking thing to my hair and shred chunks of hair off.
Yup! It now looks like there is a kitty cat sleeping in my trash can!
Very productive.

Pop!

Yay my very first award!
My Girl Mich over at Who Is Mich? popped my award cherry by bestowing this fabulous award on my blog!



This award is in Spanish, it is the Proximidade Award, which celebrates bloggy friendships. It means, "This blog invests and believes in 'proximity' [meaning, that blogging makes us 'close' - being close through proxy]."

Monday, November 17, 2008

Don't you just love Mondays?
You can just roll out of bed stumble into your daughters room ask her to rub the kinks you have in your back, because your hubby and spoiled doggy take up the whole bed forcing you to sleep contorted (and not in a good way) rolled up in a fetal position on the edge of your bed.
Then take a long hot shower trying to wake up.


When you get out of the shower your other daughter has your clothes ready fresh from the dryer so they are nice & toasty. After dressing you grab your purse and head out the door, when you get to your car it's already warmed up with the heater blowing, kids waiting patiently and the waffle sandwich that your daughter made, awaits you for the drive to school.


You dropped the kids off at school down the street and proceed to finish driving that long 7 minute ride to work. Get to work and park for 25 minutes while you put on your make-up and listen to all the new CD's your hubby made you.


You get into work, spend the whole morning catching up with friends and co-workers on how their weekend was, go and get your morning muffin, ice cold milk and water.


Sit back at your desk refill your miniature shopping cart with candy, go through emails, catch up on all the blogs you missed this weekend and count down the minutes till lunch time.

Friday, November 14, 2008

15 Mother F**ker's

Well you all know Bon Don's Hubby by now...

Kind of a smart ass, but very funny. He doesn't get angry with people the way I do after I've been extremely irritated. I've said before that he's a driver, I wasn't going to go into detail about his job before but this is one of the MANY stories he has from life on the road and I thought it was funny! My Hubby is a bus driver...yes a bus driver in California...
a bus driver in California with all us crazy people!

Here's the scene: Hubby pulls up to a stop opens the door, when a 95lb little miniature broken down Whoopi Goldberg look-alike stumbles onto the bus shit faced drunk as hell. She hangs onto the fare box to stop herself from swaying, and yells at him...
"How the Fuck do I get to Mother Fucken Gardenia?"


Hubby: You know...I'm not familiar with Gardenia...I honestly don't know. Sorry.

Drunk Lady: Ok so then where is the Mother Fucken Metrolink?

Hubby: The Metrolink is back the other way, you're going in the wrong direction.

Drunk Lady: Mother Fucker!!!... the other mother fucker told me it was this way!! Which one of you mother fuckers is lying to me?!!

Hubby: Maybe he was wrong, I don't know...but I do know that the Metrolink is towards the other direction, because if you stay on this bus you'll be heading towards the beach.

Drunk Lady: Well where does this mother fucken bus go?

Hubby: This bus goes to Huntington Beach.

Drunk Lady: Mother Fucken Huntington Beach?

Hubby: Yes.

Drunk Lady: Where the fuck am I at right now?

Hubby: Well right now you are in Stanton.

Drunk Lady: Mother Fucken Stanton!!?

Hubby: Yes.

Drunk Lady: Well give me one of those mother fucken tickets then.

Hubby: You've only put in 50 cents so that will only buy you one trip, if you're disabled.

Drunk Lady: Whatchu mean mother fucker it's not like I'm not going to pay for the mother fucker! let me off this mother fucken bus! (now she's trying to open the door)

Hubby: You have to wait for the next bus stop.

Hubby: (Hubby pulls up to the next stop and says) Here you go...remember next time before you come out and play, you need to know where you're going and where you're at.

Drunk Lady: Fuck you you fat mother fucker!

Hubby: Ok you "Ugly Mother Fucker"!

Drunk Lady stops in her tracks and starts laughing really hard turns around and says "Stupid Mother Fucker!"

Hubby: Ok well you have a good night "Lost" mother fucker! Closes the doors and leaves!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Real Quick

Ok so a few years back when the "Luxurious" Himbo and I started hanging out I noticed he was always doing things and making comments that just screamed "Bimbo"

So I started calling him a Bimbo and eventually it just turned into Himbo. It's funny because the guy is pretty smart, he's a number cruncher for crying out loud! But when it comes to the little things, well... he's a Himbo.

Here's an example of his "Himbo-ness"...remember the picture below (in my last post) the one with Himbo taking a picture with the pretty sky and my car in the background? Well last night I was over at his house watching TV, when he jumped online and started checking our blogs.


Conversation was as follows:

Himbo: I'm going on your blog right now,
I wanna see the pictures again *sits in front of his computer*
Bon Don: K... *sits up and turns towards Himbo*
Himbo: The sky looked so nice, what a pretty color! *admiring the picture*
Bon Don: Yeah, it came out nice...too bad my car was in the shot
Himbo: *starring and concentrating at the screen* wait...
Bon Don: What? What are you looking at?
Himbo: I'm just trying to see if I can see you in the car! *still concentrating on the screen*
Bon Don: *Laughing* HAHAHA No ass I wasn't in the car... I took the fricken' picture remember?!
Himbo: Oh Yeah! *falls off chair laughing*

...Really Himbo?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So tomorrow being Friday, I decided to call it "Funny Friday"
and being that it's "Funny Friday" I have another story for you guys!
It involves my Hubby... and a drunk lady.
It's a true story and it just happened last night, but I will make you wait.
*Warning*
I have to tell it exactly the way it went down which means,
the post will be completely filled with cuss words ...
I will understand if you choose to ignore my blog post entirely tomorrow. (but come back)
"And that's all I have to say about that."

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Bad Blogger

Those of you who visit Himbo's blog have noticed that lately he has been posting a few pictures of our "Autumn Sky's" out here in the OC.

Well yesterday we drove up to the roof of our parking structure at work so he could get a few shot's for his blog, so I busted out my camera and took some pictures of him being a wonderful blogger and giving his readers pretty pictures to look at!











I on the other hand suck... I don't give you pretty "Autumn Sky's" pictures to look at and tell you about my lovely walk home and appreciation for life. I tell you how I cuss people out a the voting polls and how my husband pisses on people's desks! I'm sorry.

How about I make it up to you with these lovely pictures of my favorite desk toy and this awesome little monkey?!



Ok good
I feel better now...
you're welcome!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

A Cake Story

Let me tell you a little story about a piece of chocolate cake...
One day my friend Reina Bee went on a mission to find this yummy piece of chocolate cake her friend had told her about. Reina gets to the restaurant where said cake is made and asks the girl behind the counter the following...

Reina Bee: "I need a slice of your Chocolate Wipe Out Cake,
I hear it's delicious."
Girl: "Sure, would you like it with nuts or chips?"
Reina Bee: (In a very condescending tone says)
Wait, what do you mean? Like "Lays Potato Chips"?
Girl: (says very sweet)
Oh no I meant chocolate chips...
Reina Bee: "Well then... that would make more sense than wouldn't it?!"

Well after joking that a cake with "Lay's Potato Chips"
didn't really sound all that bad...
Yup you guessed it, she made one! She hadn't put the chips on it yet in this picture because she didn't want them to get stale so tonight I shall try her Chocolate "Chip" Cake!

Wish me luck

***UPDATE***
Fat girls verdict: (me, Reina & Himbo)
"It's Delicious!"

Monday, November 10, 2008

Friday, Hubby stayed home which was perfect because after work a couple of us cool kids felt like grabbing a bite to eat and having a few drinks. Reina Bee & Lo-Mel were in the mood for some Sushi, and Himbo is never one to turn down slimy fishy stuff so off we went!

Friday night actually ran a little longer than expected, and we all partied like Rockstar's ... well some a little more than others! But here's a few pictures of the beginning of the night when everyone was on their best behavior! *wink wink*

Himbolicious & Dula Dip












Reina Bee & Lo











Well some of us ate...

and well, some of us drank...Bon Don (lush)





















Oh and here is Himbo dazzling us with his table drumming while flicking left over Wasabi in our direction!
Magical really.

Friday, November 7, 2008

I'm It!

Looks like I was tagged by Mich at Who Is Mich?

So here it goes....

1. Were you named after anyone?
Yes, my dad has twin nieces and he named me after one...weird thing is her first daughter was named Brittany (I didn't realize at the time) and I named my doggy Brittany too.

2. Do you still have your tonsils?
Yes I do, I don't think I need them out... but the extra room in my throat wouldn't be so bad! (HEY! dirty birdy's I didn't mean it that way!)


3. Would you bungee jump?
Ummm not so much anymore...Bon Don is not a little person, therefore it wouldn't be a good idea to hook me up to a cord and expect me not to snap it!


4. What is your favorite cereal?
Right now Honey Nut Cheerios (kinda boring but still covered with yummy sugar)

5. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
Nope. I wear Flats & Sandals ALL THE TIME!


6. What is your favorite ice cream?
Italian Ice Cream, Watermelon!


7. What is the first thing you notice about people?
Well no matter what, right off the bat I always try and find something pretty about every person I meet...eyes, smile, hair

8. What is your least favorite thing about yourself?
Being obsessive. nuff said there!


9. What was the last thing you ate?
Two pieces whole wheat toast with raspberry jam.

10. What are you listening to right now?
D'yer Mak'er - Led Zeppelin
... Ooo Ooh Ooo ooh Ooo oo you don't have to go ooh Ooh

11. Last movie you watched?
Lethal Weapon 4 (Obviously i was forced to watch it)


12. What did you dream about last night?
Don't remember dreaming because I was too busy hanging off the bed! (not as fun as it sounds folks)

13. What book are you reading?
David Sedaris - When You Are Engulfed in Flames YAY!!

14. Summer or winter?
Winter, only because I can have an excuse to wrap myself up in comfy blankets and bake!

15. Do you have any special talents?
I can speed read...wait does it count if I don't remember what I read? *wink*

I Tag....

Himbo @ Confessions of a Fantabulous Himbo
Gabby @ Gabby She Wrote
bekahboo @ The Smell of Wine and Cheap Perfume
my sista @ Runaway Train
copy, paste, tag.... you know what to do!
Yay my Sister has finally come into the blog world!
let's show this old' bitty some love...

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Gotta Love Those Random Drug Tests

After my story yesterday about my little "outburst"
and this next story I'm about to tell you,
you may get a bad impression from me & my Hubby...
just try not to hold it against me.*giggle*

In our defense, we are not always so... umm...
what's the word I'm looking for? ... mean?
Ok we'll go with "mean", we are not mean people but honestly
sometimes people can just annoy you to a point of no return!

So my Hubby's job requires random drug tests like most companies do,
but because of his profession he is not even allowed to have alcohol in his
system even if he works the next day.
Yes, I know pretty strict, sometimes it sucks.

Anyway yesterday Hubby gets called in to the clinic to take a drug test,
which is totally fine because Hubby obviously hasn't been drinking
and definitely doesn't have any dope in his system.

Hubby arrives at the clinic and only see’s the janitor cleaning the lobby, the janitor tells Hubby that the little nurse man is probably out back smoking a cigarette and he’ll go and get him. Hubby’s not really in a hurry at this point but thanks the janitor and off he goes.

Little nurse man comes back inside reeking of smoke looking a little annoyed that he was disturbed during his smoke break and hands Hubby a cup to piss in and says “fill it up to this line”

Hubby had just taken a break about 15 minutes before he was notified to take his drug test so he doesn’t really have to go at this point, but he tried anyway and got close enough to the “line” he was supposed to reach.

Well now little nurse man takes the cup and has to fill up two separate vials, he's pours the first one and spills. Little nurse man seemed to be irritated because this happened. Now he's attempting to fill the second one but he doesn't have enough "liquid" to fill it. Had he not spilled the first one he could have totally filled the second one! So what does little nurse man do?

He spilled out both vials and hands Hubby a new cup and says
"Do it again!"

Hubby's starting to get a little upset with little nurse man
and tells him a thing or two about his attitude
and how it was his fault for spilling the goods.

Now Hubby has to drink his weight in water and sit there for about an hour, when finally he's ready to go. He tells little nurse man he needs a cup and little nurse mans says,
"Now "YOU'RE" going to have to wait!" all snooty.

Really little nurse man? You dare challenge Bon Don's Hubby!

Little nurse man finally gives Hubby the cup and tells him
not to turn on the water faucet to wash his hands until
after he brings the cup back to him. So Hubby knows
he can't knock out little nurse man for being an asshole
of course Hubby has more sense than that to jeopardize his job,
but it wouldn't be right if little nurse man felt all
high & mighty for being a little punk right!?

Now what does Hubby do?
Well being awesome and vengeful like his dear wife (me)
his pisses in the cup (to the line)
then proceeds to piss all over the outside of the cup
all over his hand to the point where there is piss everywhere...
then walks over and places it right on little nurse man's desk
with a piss ring and piss dropping onto the desk.
Washes his hands and tells little nurse man to have a good night.

Yup that's my man!

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Adventures In Voting...

So today I told this little story during lunch and
Himbo insisted that I tell you all.

*Disclaimer Side Note: Yes, I have been known to a little opinionated in public, NOT all the time! I'm not one of those obnoxious people, but when it's called for I don't hold back. And YES for the record I will admit I was a little annoyed to begin with because I was a tad-bit hungry. My bad.

Yesterday I left work a little early to hit the voting polls, I finally get to where I thought was my voting place and stood in line with every walk of life in Orange County, when all of a sudden this 400lb trashy looking loud mouth, power hungry heifer started yelling at all of the volunteers for calling people next in line, she actually said "NO!! Don't you call these people in again, I already told you I'll bring them in...you're gonna screw it all up again!!"
So now this nasty beotch is hollering near my ear, so I picked up my hand as to keep her at bay and I turned my head a little with what I can only imagine as a look of disgust on my face. She finally gets the hint and takes her and her stained shirt back inside.

*Another Side Note: I have a hard time controlling my facial expressions (I've been told) and sometimes I have to really try and keep them under control.

Meanwhile there is the world's stupidest conversation
going on in line right in front of me!

Like I said before, there was like every walk of life in line right.
Well in front of me there's this little blond petite girl, in front of her there is this other normal looking mexican chick and some guy talking to the this young girl to my left, I'll say about 19 or 20 she looks kind of normal, tight pants with wedge shoes tank top and hair in one of those faux hawk bumps...trashy but "normal" that is until the idiot speaks!

I'm not sure of how familiar everyone is with the "spanglish accent" we have going on our here in Cali sometimes but it's horrible and that's one of my BIGGEST pet peeves!
Almost like Rosie Perez with a Mexican twist.

ANYWAY, so this girl (we'll call her Rosie Perez)
starts talking to this guy in my line
(I guess they went to school together or something)
and in her Spanglish accent Rosie Perez says,
"YeAAhh I hate school it's stooopid, I'm gonna just drop out and work two jobs or somethin' cause I just don't like it" The guy says something back to her, I didn't really pay attention because I was too busy giggling out loud AT her.

Well now big heifer comes back to tell people to make two lines according to last names A through L in one line and the rest in my line, the guy stays in my line and Rosie Perez asks "What's your last name howcome your over there?"
and the guys says something like "Williamson"
and Rosie Perez said "Eew like a white boy, you have a white boy last name!"

again I'm giggling out loud and by this time I'm sure my face looked like "you're kidding right" I was kind of embarrassed for her, there was about 30people in line.

So now Rosie Perez is getting antsy and says "Ugh this is taking long"
and young Mr. Williamson says "Who are you voting for?"
Rosie Perez says "I don't even know, I don't even know why I'm voting"
then of course i couldn't take it anymore and I said
"You're a Fucken Idiot!"
Rosie Perez turned around and said "Are you talking to me?"
I said "YES! You're a Fucken Idiot!"
She turn around and mumbled "whatever"
So I said, "You don't even know why you're even voting?!
You shouldn't even be here,
you should just stick to stripping you Fucken Idiot!"
(nothing against strippers, I have plenty of friends who are "dancers")

I know a bit harsh but she deserved it. right?

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

CHECK IT OUT

Check out Far at Everyday Soap Opera she's doing a giveaway on her already awesome site, this girl is too cool for school.


Himbo and I had agreed if we are ever in the Canada neighborhood, you know "just kind of passing through" we have to totally party with her, Mich and the rest of those fun girls!


YAY FAR!

I'm Good.

Well after about a week of celebrating my birthday like a Rockstar, it's finally over. Thank goodness for that because my liver & kidneys need a break! I layed low these past couple of days to recuperate,
this old bitty ain't what she used to be!

Don't get me wrong though, I had a BLAST... I hung out with every cool kid I know, I was spoiled rotten by my Hubby and friends, I ate and drank everything my little heart desired, I got awesome gifts. I love birthdays.

Yesterday I hung out with "The Luxurious One" Himbolicious, we had a carb-fest at this yummy little Italian place and did some shopping and running around. Himbo said he had to buy some nutritious goodies, you know like Champagne, Frozen Pizza's and Fruit Punch (for when I come over) after finally convincing Himbo the energizer bunny that I had a turtle head creeping out from all that Italian food he finally released me from captivity, man that boy can shop!